My son likes a girl at school. I am thrilled about this because he has always been the shy one, too self-conscious to even talk to girls. It is nice to see him finally coming out of his shell at sixteen. The problem is that this girl is popular and all the guys like her. She hangs around mostly with just three guys, my son included. In this group, my son is the only one that drives and has his own car. They are all in the band, and seem happy just hanging out together. My son confided in me that he likes her more than a friend, but that she does not feel the same. He says that he will just have to be satisfied being friends with her. That is better than nothing. Last Saturday at the band competition I saw the girl with one of the other boys (my son's best friend). They were walking together and he had his arm around her. They were looking like more than "just friends". I hesitated to mention this to my son, even though I wanted to. When we got home that night, he brought it up to me. (I am thrilled that he talks to me about this stuff) He told me that the girl and his best friend had feelings for each other, and that he guessed that they are now "going together". His heart was clearly broken. I told him not to be sad, and that maybe it was better, now he could hang around with more people, not just that little group. I told him that he should not just be their chauffeur, and he agreed with me, that he did not want to be. Sunday the girl called. She wanted to hang out with just Preston that day. Of course, he went right over there. He told me later that she felt bad about breaking up the group by dating just one guy and that she did not want to lose Preston's friendship.
My problem: Is she sincere; or a smooth operator that just doesn't want to lose her taxi?
My advice to him: Be sure to keep the lines of communication open with your best friend. She might be selling you a line of bull!
Of course he thinks that I am just a cynical old lady. He believes that she is a wonderful girl and can do no wrong.
I personally would like to get her alone in a small room and interrogate her - but that is not an option!
Raising teenagers is truly like "nailing jello to a tree"!!!!